We are used to growing up with the idea that love is "for life", a bit like what we are told and read in fairy tales. Unfortunately, however, reality is different and sometimes, despite ourselves, what we believed to be eternal and indestructible begins to waver, until it can be interrupted forever. When this happens, we are enveloped in extreme, excruciating and deep pain. We suffer without respite and the hope of being able to get out of it does not seem to be part of ourselves. The end of a relationship is associated with a great sense of failure, especially when we had built something important, perhaps started our new family. However, we should try to reflect on the fact that not always an end can be considered a failure and not always what happens to us is the direct consequence of our actions. It would be helpful to try to scale back the idea of the power we have by reminding ourselves that perhaps there is meaning behind life's events, even the most painful ones. However, in the most painful moments, it can be very useful not to close in on ourselves too much and to rely on a specialist who is able to find that lost meaning, guiding us and helping us to find the light that was momentarily dimmed or turned off.
Isolation, if prolonged, risks further complications that are best avoided.
Speech has an important therapeutic power, it can become our ally in daily life and can show us that taking on different attitudes and expectations can bring us well-being. We all have the right to be happy, to feel good and balanced.
Let us try to treasure and enrich even the pain and negative periods. If only the bad times resurface in our minds, or only the sense of guilt for the mistakes made will torment us to no avail, let us instead try to leave a space, initially small and then increasingly large, for all that is good and positive that we were able to give and live.
A love affair may end, but what was beautiful remains and is part of us. We have been able to love and receive love and this is already a great success that we will hold on to because, although today there is only emptiness, something equally beautiful can come back again if we are ready to welcome it. However, we must avoid withdrawing and hiding, closing the doors of feelings because there is too much fear left. Loving implies courage and loving ourselves is the highest manifestation of the strength we have. Let us start from ourselves, from our wounds and let us heal, little by little, our mourning, trying to add awareness and meaning to something that at the moment has none and is incomprehensible to us. In this way the light will return and we will be ready again.
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